Past Poetry

Affliction

I have an affliction...
or better yet, an addiction...
not to that of drugs or cigarettes...
but of one that either cause a feeling of happiness or regret...
for I played the fool...
an idiot, I stumbled into the bottomless pool...
I thought I was immune...
that I was well in tune...
but my wall crashed down and I allowed it in...
now I can never seem to escape it again...
I often end up hurt or somehow suffering...
relating everything and achieving nothing...
terrified, I run around...
often crashing back to the ground...
unable to retain my full mental state...
always on the point of break...
the extraction of this poison shall never cease...
always running beneath the crease...
I've opened the door to try to gain what I had once cast aside...
but it just doesn't seem to wish to come inside...
I guess that's it, I should have handled things better...
now I can only express myself in letters...
whatever...
forever...
over? through?
will I ever stop thinking of you?


Creation

There was once a day,
When the boy would play.
He loved animals and the arts,
Talent overflowed from many parts.
But no longer does he frolic through fields of green,
Or spend time with those in between.
For something happened over the years,
As childhood was ripped away and sent him to tears.
Innocence destroyed, the world revealed,
The mystery removed, the skin pealed...
At first, pure terror flowed through the young lad,
At the latest discovery, he could no longer be glad.
The possibility that everything was a lie,
That realization that all would soon die.
But it was not death itself that he felt,
It was more the unlucky hand that he was dealt.
The death of all that he once knew,
The death of the feelings he once felt true.
Sure, the physical beings may still remain,
But it is a mere shadow, upheld in vain....
The fear turned to an anger at the world,
Why could he not control what was hurled?
A lust for power soon overtook,
An army he built from the ashes and soot.
Followers built up and soon he decided,
To wage war upon the world he once resided.
Fires tore across the plains,
Cities and towns destroyed in his reign.
Entire communities ripped apart,
While families helpless, tried to depart.
First believed as a quest to better the land,
After years of carnage, he learned to understand...
"What have I done?" he muttered on day,
"I had the world and then I threw it away."
Tears began to well in his eyes,
Melting away his brutish disguise.
"What have I done? Why did I do it?"
"Corruption overtook me. I blew it..."
He wept as he realized the hate he'd created,
All this time his feelings had been heavily sedated.
With a final sigh, he'd made up his mind,
The dusty gears began to grind.
There was little left for him to do,
He'd become a monster to which everyone knew...
No real friends existed in this new place,
Only fragments of the human race.
Sure, he could try to go back and save what's left,
But how could he be sure the sweet power now slept.
Instead he began a silent escape,
Crawling down the walls and towards the cape.
Towards a cave, he swam unnoticed,
Into the darkness, with unknown motives.
A time machine stood before him,
Casting a friendly aura that slowed him.
This was it, the solution,
To all the problems, his pollution.
Back in time, he swirled back,
To a time where there wasn't so much to lack.
But rather than attempt to repair the past,
He instead destroyed himself with a gun blast.
Little did he know that on that very day,
He could have easily found a way to stay.
The world went on, his friends confused,
Why would someone who had so much to loose,
Take their life on a simple muse?
What made him do it? They shall never know,
But it was his unwillingness to show,
What he felt inside and instead held it in,
Desensitizing himself from what he could win.
I guess that's just simple how the world turns,
And that no one ever really learns.
So, what do we do when the worst does happen?
We cannot go back in time to fix a slappin...
Hit in the face, the world enjoys,
Playing with us like little toys.
All I can say really, is that I mean no harm,
I sorry if the damage has been done.
Desensitizing myself from feelings is not a choice,
I'm sorry, but I must learn to use my voice.
Battered and broken, yet still trying to fly,
I do not have a longing to die.
Just to find what it's all about,
And why there's so much doubt.
I've bored you enough with my endless poetry,
And that brings us to the end of the story.
Did he really pull himself out of this world?
No, in fact, he was saved by a girl.
She showed him that there was more to life,
And did not removed this feeling with a single strife.
She still stands by his side today,
They remain together to this day.
Sure, they've had rough times together,
But they are, more or less, birds of a feather.
She keeps him sane and soothes his lust,
His hunger for power turned to dust.
In exchange, he loves her so,
Doing everything he can, bounding through the snow.
Happily ever after or maybe not,
Tough times can never be completely forgot.
But they don't allow this to get in their way,
For they love each other anyway.
Accepting each other for who they are,
Happily drinking a few at the bar.
No evil ruler, he became,
A different path, a different name.
The monster defeated, the creature slain,
He had finally been tamed.
This is the end, is there more?
You tell me, for one can implore.
Happiness? Is that what this is about?
Or is it the affect of pain and doubt?
Once again, you tell me?
For now, I must flee...


Ode to the Dog

Life as a dog is no piece of cake,
Though some may spend their time lounging by the lake.
For a dog means loyalty, honesty, and devotion,
Almost as if an act of compulsion.
Faithfully trotting at your master's heels,
Even when you'd rather be running through fields.
Occasionally times may get tough,
And the master may decide to get rough.
But you play along, no teeth you bare,
Just a light growl to give him a scare.
Sometimes you may end up locked out of the house,
Feed late in the night or forgotten about.
You then have a chance to leave forever,
But an unknown force brings you back to your tether.
Perhaps it's because, or at least seems,
That man and dog have worked in teams?
Or maybe it's an evolutionary tack,
Held from past wolves in tight-knit pack.
Whatever it is, it keeps you near,
About your master you have no fear.
Always prepared to defend,
Even if the foe makes your fur stand on end.
Obeying nearly every command,
Sit, stay, an attempt to stand.
So much devotion to just one master,
Could this be a recipe for disaster?
There is one thing I cannot see,
Would the master do the same for me?
But what makes you do this?
Often setting your entire life amiss?
Sitting in the rain for hours on end,
Waiting for him to arrive for a mere pat on the head.
Getting hollered at at for drying off inside,
Trailing mud to the fireside.
Sure, a dog's not perfect, that shall never be true,
But you'll never find anyone more faithful to you.
Lying with your head on your master's lap,
Stretched across the couch in his nightcap.
The fire grows low and the flames flicker away,
Nuzzled close to your master, you end the day.
With a weary eye you look around and see,
That there is no place you'd rather be...


A Whimper in Time

Hit in the head with a rock,
Lost a favorite sock.
Just a whimper in time...
Frog gets away,
Dog dies the next day.
A whimper in time...
Fail first spelling test,
Miserable even at your best.
Just a whimper in time...
Jr. High, what a drag,
Stuff your head in a paper bag.
A whimper in time...
War tears across the nation,
Screaming in frustration.
Just a whimper in time...
Friends seem to desert you,
While others try to hurt you.
A whimper in time...
Good times go bad,
Thoughts of what you could have had.
Just a whimper in time...
Hope turns to pessimism,
Try to find a new specimen.
A whimper in time...
Hunger and lust,
Turns to beat you in the dust.
Just a whimper in time...
Colors drain,
Cruel world remains.
A whimper in time...
Search for distraction,
No satisfaction.
Just a whimper in time...
Strike out on your own,
Try to find a new home.
A whimper in time...
Dead-end job,
Ungrateful slob.
Just a whimper in time...
Now your life has past,
But no peace at last.
A whimper in time...
Lost in my mind,
Chains that bind,
How could one be so blind?
Just a whimper in time...
No escape...
To late...
Swallowed the bait...
Can't wait...
A whimper in time...
Just a whimper in time...


Midnight Thoughts

Laying here, body shivering...
Candlelight low, mind quivering...
So many thoughts course through my brain,
Some overwhelming, yet all contained.
Muzzle on firmly, collar tight,
Oh, if only I could win that fight.
Someday, I say, I will break free,
But away from myself, how could that be?
To say what I will and do as I may,
Haha, to do so would cause quite the fray.
But then again, we all have our limits,
So I'll simply savor the tiny tidbits.
Forever at wait and always ready,
Often accepting blows from the machete.
With teeth bared, I sometimes fight back,
But to those I fight, wounding I lack.
They say all hurts heal overtime,
How long shall I spend licking mine?
And how about those dealt different blows?
Some more serious than other propose.
To watch them suffer, drives me insane,
It takes all my strength to retain.
My urge to go curl up by their side,
And let them know in my they can confide.
But alas, I somewhat hold back,
An invisible force which I cannot attack.
I should leap through it and hope for the best,
But fear forces me to lose that contest.
So I guess I'll just lay here until I hear the word,
Although this all sounds rather absurd.
Quite funny really, how this all turned out,
This was no where near what I wish to write about.
Oh well, time for sleep, dreams forgiving,
Far better than the world we're living.
Maybe someday it'll come true,
But in the end that's all we can do.
A simply hope upon a star,
Playing for par?
Is it a mere technicality?
Will I someday believe I don't want it to become a reality?
Enoughs, enough, for I grow weary,
This poem's turned out rather dreary.
Now to leave with something that flows,
Ah, here's a good one, "So it goes..."


Graduation

The days are numbered,
Time is shortened,
Only another week til life is distorted...
Graduation is approaching,
Days spent marching,
To the droning beat, no slouching...
Friendly faces slip away,
Caps and gowns in the way,
As each person collects on this day...
A diploma declaring high school done,
Days spent lounging in the sun,
Are now over, "life" has begun...
A sadness at the realization of time wasted,
Of all the times when I simply waited,
For the right moment I never recognized...
I suppose now begins yet another chapter,
One I shall have learned from hereafter,
Will there ever be, "Happily ever after?"
Now I march to the plate,
Body trembling, mind awake,
For this moment can no longer wait...
Fear of what is about to begin,
For now it has all sunken in,
Some of these people I will never see again...
For the best, I wish all,
I guess I can no longer stall,
Final days spent lounging in the hall...
Suddenly my heart has uplifted,
Something in my mind must have shifted,
Brainwaves have finally drifted...
Upon something good,
A thought more hopeful, as it should,
A wishful thought floating through the wood...
Abandonment is a choice,
A choice not made if I find my voice,
To stand before him and his Rolls-Royce...
The world may not be such a horrible place after all,
It's already been such a long fall,
No matter how it may make you feel small...
A better world may lie ahead,
Choices are mine, up to my head,
I've learnt' many lessons, I won't end up dead...
Mine for the taking?
Or at least something wide and gaping,
Can't turn now, no time for escaping...
Now I depart on a hopeful note,
For as I watch friends set sail in their boat,
I won't stay on shore like a stubborn old goat...
It'll all come together over time,
Just like the choppiness of this rhyme,
Wiping off the coats of grime...
Grasp the day!
No debt to pay!
Take time to play!
Search for companions,
Become a champion,
Watch out for the large canyon...
Sure, my days are numbered,
And my time is shortened,
But my life will be no more distorted...
It's really not the end of the world,
But it's certainly a curve ball to be hurled,
I don't want to end up in a corner, curled...
Time to fly,
Soar to the sky,
For now, Goodbye!